If I donate, when will my identifying information be released?

You can find out more about what information others can find out about you here.

Can I donate anonymously in Victoria or somewhere else in Australia?

No.

Who will benefit from my donation?

People who benefit from donation may include couples diagnosed with infertility, single women who want to have a baby on their own or same-sex couples who require a donation to have a baby. Find out more here.

I want to donate. What are some of the things I should consider?

How this may affect you and your family. Will you tell your extended family and friends? Consider the genetic connection to your own children and other members of your extended family.

You will not be a legal parent of a donor-conceived child and will not appear on the birth certificate. You will have no legal rights or obligations to the parent(s) or child born as a result of your donation. How will you feel towards the person/people you help create?

  • How this may affect you and your family. Will you tell your extended family and friends? Consider the genetic connection to your own children and other members of your extended family.
  • You will not be a legal parent of a donor-conceived child and will not appear on the birth certificate. You will have no legal rights or obligations to the parent(s) or child born as a result of your donation. How will you feel towards the person/people you help create?
  • The people to whom you donate may have different values, backgrounds, beliefs, and parenting styles from your own. How do you feel about that?
  • The information you would like to share and type of relationship you would like in future with the recipient parents and donor-conceived person.
  • If you donate to someone you know, what relationship and contact will you have with the recipient parent(s) and child. What will your role be and what will they call you?

Where can I get more help?

Discuss any concerns you have with your partner, close friends or family, known donor or your counsellor. It can also be helpful to contact a support group or hear from others who have had similar experiences.

What can I do to support my family members of friends going through the donor conception process?

Listen to them. Acknowledgement and support go a long way to help non-biological parents feel secure in their role.

I’m in a same-sex relationship. Will my experience be different?

Regardless of the roles in your family, love, commitment and shared values are good building blocks for any family. Most same-sex parents say that while biology can be important it does not affect how they love their children. Gay fathers may not feel the anxieties associated with being a non-biological parent as keenly, or for as long, because they don’t have to deal with issues of pregnancy, birth and breastfeeding. While for non-biological lesbian mothers, pregnancy, birth, and breastfeeding can sometimes be difficult and they may experience feelings of grief and loss or feel excluded. Once the child stops breastfeeding, they often say there is no longer any difference between them and they feel more secure in their role and in their relationship with their child.

What is my role in the family going to look like?

Many non-biological parents worry about their role in the family, particularly their role in relation to their child. This can be challenging for some people, especially in same-sex relationships, as there are no established societal norms for their relationship. Some techniques for overcoming this include sharing the practical parenting responsibilities (e.g. feeding and caring) and time spent parenting. Flexible working arrangements (e.g. working part-time, working from home) can help to share the primary-care role.
Regardless of the roles in your family, love, commitment and shared values are good building blocks for any family.

Will the donor have any parental responsibility for my child?

Recipient parent(s) receiving donor treatment are the legal parent(s) responsible for all parental decisions. Donors have no legal rights or responsibilities in relation to the child.
A common fear is that the donor will not be able to let go of parental responsibility and will want to intrude or interfere with your family. It is important that everyone involved including partners (if any) express how they feel about the arrangement, roles and consent.

How do people describe their donor to their child?

The language used to describe the donor may vary and can include ‘Dad/Mum’ (coparenting), ‘donor Dad/Mum’, the donor’s first name, ‘special helper’, ‘generous man/lady’, ‘nice egg lady’ or some variation. The use of names; the relationship between parent,  donor, and child; and the donor’s role and responsibilities are  unique to each family.

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